Desperate to sign
A big Premier Division team was very anxious to sign up a certain top-class player. However, nothing they offered would induce him to sign and in desperation they stooped to more underhand methods.
The team manager sent his secretary - blonde, 5'2", 38-22-36 - to try to persuade the reluctant striker to sign up. To his surprise, he heard nothing from the girl for over a week.
Then one morning she walked into his office and said, 'I've got good news and bad new for you, boss.
The good news is - he's ready to sign. The bad news is - he's more than two stone down from his playing weight!'
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